in the real beginning

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mun toinen blogi (suomeksi):
another blog of mine (finnish):
skitsofreeni.blogspot.com

i'm not guru or drug user to write these texts, i'm schizophrenic. schizophrenia is gift in european india, or they are
holy. in middle ages they were after schiphrenic until(?) carmelites(i'm not sure) protected schizophrenic because 2 of
them were schizophrenic (and i think that those times were not known mental diseaces, makes it strange.) and later they
were told to be holy. i told european india that none of you mix that land and people as american india.

you can write messages down there, it would be nice.

if you read from texts direct from link, you do not see all, press 'lue lisää' on the right to view more.

(mulle, to me) merkkaa tämän alapuolelle numero, ota tämä ylemmät silti mukaan julkaistavaksi: aloita kirjoittaminen
myöhemmin tästä. kopioi & liitä silti ylhäältä.
start reading/writing from here:
- number here, numero tähän, release upper, julkaise ylemmät.

i some times said you should be selfish, i ment you should be your self, no matter what.

humanoids said that there is something they had to tell me, worm humanoids are not humanoids, they are not from space
but voices told them human-oid means something like humanoid means human-like being, i don't know what they thought of
that. and anyway, there is this one, i don't know are there more, like from paraller dimension, humanoid species that
are from humans future. perhaps in our paraller dimension human-oids are more developed than us.

they said (not sure who) that if you write about things, you should include everything in it, otherwise they feel
abandoned, like i did not like dinosaurs, as a kid i liked, but not sure how/what to write about those things. some
people get rid of these things by saying they did not exist, i just want to tell, if that is my opinion too, how did
they exist and who invented them. i've heard that someone putted those bones there. but there is problem, i do not want
to put those in my microcosmos. perhaps i can cure them by knowing what is their reason to exist and set them free.
perhaps its in ancient times some one wanted to get rid of evil people. but there is problem, they are our ancestors, or
are they, did humanoids make people by gene manipulation. voices said some people tried to destroy beginning, and gays
made dinosaurs. how can we go into beginning if there is dinosaurs? (i mean you should include everything it that comes
into your mind.) they said too if you lie, you get liars into yourself, microcosmos perhaps. for me seems like beings
are escaping something from a past, and they never really fixed the big reason behind all. i think there behind
dinosaurs is the reality, not something builded above something. and can we go behind dinosaurs, time before they
existed? i see they are above all beginning, if you go into beginning, you are inside of dinosaurs. i'm happy there
existed vegetarian (herbivore) dinosaurs also.

in my world someone said christians do not believe in god, and they are no more religious, believers, if they do not have
belief.

someone told me wormhumanoids came alive, i saw some of them dance like someone dances in the middle of the forest.

i'm actually quite selfish guy, i am what i am and want it, i'm not going to be born again with these stupidities exists
in this world. perhaps i should not say, but i say, i don't know where i'm going. i see my self as an artist.

if you understand world is matrix, or some sort of gnostic system, you become god. you order life, mostly your own, dont
know if others too.